Easter 2014 and my Birthday

I haven't written in a long time because of a tragedy that struck me and my family in the early part of this year. But this Easter, we seemed to be the hallelujah people, as Pope John Paul II said "Do not abandon yourselves to despair. We are the Easter people and hallelujah is our song"

It became so true in my case. Lent came early for us on the First Saturday of January. My brother died, all of a sudden, our world crumbled. I personally didn't know how to go on in this world anymore. I couldn't explain the loss, I couldn't explain how my emotions were--- there were too many things to process and even now, if I try to recall everything, I still feel that I will not be able to go on without breaking down.

We are in mourning ever since, and holy week was very evident to us. God seemed to be absent in our trial, our misery.... but no matter how I deny it, I came to a realization that I came to understand Christ's passion even more. I used to contemplate and meditate Christ's pain during lent before this year--- but I remained to be just a mere observer. But this year was different. My brother who I thought was doing nothing for God, have become my gateway to God's wisdom and work in my life. Through his death, I have come to know of God's faithfulness, His mercy, His thirst for souls.... I was humbled--- I thought I was the one who loved God and did more for God than anyone around me---- but on the contrary, I was only putting on a show. God knew me better than anyone, and in His grace--- he saved me from myself--- he saved me from my masks, my hatred, my unforgiving heart, my pride, my blindness. I was a mess, a filthy sinner.

Through my brother's death, I came to know more about God---- I used to know God in His justice, but now, I know God in His infinite mercy.... that is what I hold on to, because without God's Mercy, who can stand?

Holy week 2014 have been very meaningful to me.
Came Easter, my birthday. God gave me a gift, He had my aunt call my mom to tell her that she dreamt of my brother  on Easter Vigil kneeling before a resurrected Christ. And he was wearing white and finally turned to my aunt and waved goodbye to follow Christ. It was something that greatly set me free---- my God is the God of the living, He has risen, and so will those who followed Him. Winning against death, Jesus will certainly be faithful to those who followed him.

God also made it happen that I get to see the relics of the greatest Pope that I look up to, the Pope who knew artists the best. I asked Pope John Paul II to guide us in the media.

Then Easter came, I went to two Masses to offer for atonement and for conversion. And in between Masses, God inspired the musicians to play a Happy Birthday song, it was so random--- no one there knew that it was my birthday because no one there knew me--- But God knew me. It made me smile, I disregarded my birthday to make way for the mother of celebrations which was His resurrection--- but He included me. 

I am sold--- I am in love with the God who loves me. Who disciplines me when I am in a mess---- it is a painful travel to stay faithful to Him---- but I know it will be worth it. I sing my hallelujah--- with the new hope and new life, which Easter represents--- I want to shine the light of Christ in the world. Amen!

There goes my Diva days in the trash

First, I know I haven't written for a very long time, been so busy I guess.
How long was it? Oh yeah, I guess the last was on my birthday. I wrote a lot of high hopes and dreams in my last entry--- and how am I faring now?

Well, first of all, I and my sister were able to publish 4 serial books about art. We are very humbled and honored, because without God, those things will NEVER be possible. I will tell the things that happened in a different entry, but for now, allow me to have the liberty to be grateful with all the blessings.

What else?--- Oh yeah, we were also commissioned to draw for a sinology book written by a very famous Italian priest in China. It was I who suggested the pen and ink style so that it will go with the book's theme. I remembered that I couldn't thank God enough for the opportunity.

I have a lot of things to be thankful about, that until now, I am still in awe at everything that happened and things which are happening. I have been surrounded by a lot of awesome people all the time. That alone is one of the most special gift.

And now, I am going to embark on  a new journey. I  don't know what God sees in me, that He is making me do something which is beyond me (I think). But God has a lot of awesome things in store for me, I know that--- and every time He makes me do things, I am always blown away.

You may think dear reader, that I am such a presumptuous person to ever think that. But I have valid reasons to think this way... take note that I am not saying that I am cut above the rest... on the contrary, I came to realize that each person have their own special mission in life which are so great in their own way. And thinking about God's great providence through these people humbled me very much.

And now, here I am, telling God that I am tired--- why are some people enjoying life when I wasn't?
Why should I suffer when I do nothing wrong (or so I thought) why is it that I think I am being punished?

I felt so frustrated and felt God was unfair, and then the answer came to me this Sunday. I was playing the Prodigal Son drama---not the youngest child, but the eldest child who was such a diva when his brother, the wayward came home.

It came in the form of Fr. Armand Robleza's homily. He just had an operation on the heart and his gall stones, and had one of his brothers died a month ago. But still, he was driven and passionate about pasturing the sheep in the Don Bosco Parish. He was having short breaths while he was talking, and his face was grey and ashen. I felt scared for him, but at the same time, I knew God was showing me a man who clearly wasn't doing anything wrong, but was embracing every trial God sends him with a cheerful heart. And through that, I was once again humbled---- because compared to this man of God, who am I to think that I already sacrificed so much? When in fact--- I am nothing compared to the priest who passionately serves his people even though he clearly wasn't feeling well.

He said in his homily, that in marriage, the attitude should be that the spouse should be ready to give all of himself to his spouse, because that is what Jesus did for the people. I am a Christian--- and I have given myself to Christ in baptism, and every time I affirm my baptismal vows on Easter. And because of that, I should be ready to give myself to what makes Jesus happy.

With that, I went home. My diva days, I knew, are numbered. From now on, I will give more of myself for others.... the people who was the reason Jesus came to earth and be crucified. Why? Because I have decided to love Him--- and to love Him means, to make Him happy, and to make Him happy, is to follow Him by doing what He did when He was on earth.

The call was, to reflect Christ---- it is scary. I know from now on, my life will never be easy---but who said it would be easy??? No one did! But all of them, who trekked the road to follow Jesus, revealed that it was all worth it!

Thank God for these holy people, thank God for these self sacrificing people, because if not for them,, this world, in a split second, will stop. Because people suddenly decide that they will no longer want to sacrifice their lives for others. Scary isn't it?

Anyway, this is such a beautiful day for me.... my soul was nourished. And once again, I was put to shame because of my selfishness. It's the saints, and the people like the priests in the parish, or the lay people who sacrifice their lives for others who are my heroes. They make me want to become a better person.

Thank you Lord for that. About me being here, I know, is not an accident.

Forgive my grammatical errors---- will fix it in the morning. I am sleepy now, but didn't want to put this off till tomorrow.

Goodnight!

World Youth Day 2011: Madrid, Spain

World Youth Day 2011 held in Madrid Spain is happening right now. August 15-21, 2011.

Pope Benedict XVI leads the youths all over the world with the theme: "Rooted and Built Up in Jesus Christ, Firm in the Faith." (Colossians 2:7)

What exactly is rooted and built up in Christ?
For me it's when you go through a lot of trials in your journey in life. And through these trials and storms, you get to know the one person who stays with you after you are stripped of everything is Jesus alone.
Through the trials, God shows you His mighty hand, to help you through.

For the full article of the message of Pope Benedict the XVI in World Youth Day 2011 in Madrid, Spain. please click here

A learned a Great Deal in My Cathoic Faith this Holy Week

In my years of existence and of being a member of the Catholic Faith since birth, this was the first time I heard about the truth as to why Christ had to die on the cross for the sins of mankind.

For so long, I thought that He died on the cross to redeem us, by shedding his blood in order to expiate and placate the justice that God thirsts for.. But this isn't what redemption is all about!

Theologians have twisted this story over the years... it was all a mistake taught by the bishops and priests and so called theologians.... but never the Pope!

Cardinal Ratzinger, now Pope Benedict XVI pointed out that this theory, that God needed His Son's blood in order to redeem us, that only the Person of equal rights and stature has the right to redeem us is all a misunderstanding and it came from mankind's mis-representation of salvation of mankind which they based on the feudal system... wherein the offended party could only be appeased if the offensive party shed blood of a person of the same noble birth! It is in direct contradiction to the parable of the Prodigal Son wherein the father loves his son and welcomed him home unconditionally.



Just as Hell wasn't made by God to punish the demons who betrayed Him (For they themselves made hell because they cannot live in a place that God made because they hated God and everything that God created.), so the story of redemption was twisted!

According to the original doctrines of the Church, Jesus came here not to appease the father with His shedding of blood, but to show God's love for us. He sent His only begotten Son to bridge His love to us, with Jesus becoming man and telling the people about God's love. The people, who are full of violence and hatred were anxious to inflict Jesus with sufferings. Thus, Jesus, knowing this, underwent the suffering till the end, till man was satisfied. He went through it all without complaining so that He could send the message that God loves mankind, contrary to the lies that the devil feeds them. And by the power of His infinite mercy, he won man over... not all, but at least there were those who responded to His sufferings and understood why He came to Earth.

Only Christianity have a God like this... a loving God who is willing to die for His people. Such a good story. It's hard to imagine that for so long, I knew an angry and vengeful God. Clearly, what the media feed us are all distorted truths!

I am lucky to have found Christ like this! Lucky to be in a 3-day recollection of knowing Christ this holy week... I wouldn't exchange this time with Him for anything! :)